I’m a classical musician residing in San Francisco. I am currently composing for a film called “HAFU” which is about the experiences of mixed-Japanese people. Updates on the movie can be seen and heard on www.hafufilm.com and www.wintonwhite.com.
For most of my life I never fit in; from being picked on by the Japanese neighbor’s kids to having mostly white friends in college. I was the token “hafu” kid (or “hapa” in America). I’m a very social person that gets along with a variety of people of all walks, but I have never fit into a mold. Although I like being different, naturally as human beings do, I still would like to fit-in to an extent…or I should say, be accepted.
I take pride in my old-school Japanese upbringing (as we would call in Japanese, “wabi sabi”). I was told that I act more Japanese than guys in Tokyo. Even if many people in Japan may not accept me as a “real Japanese,” the important thing is that I know that I am full Japanese and full American. If people can’t comprehend that, that’s their problem. I am bilingual and bicultural; I speak both and I think in both cultural mindsets; I am both Japanese and American.
I can totally relate to being not accepted by my peers growing up. I had a hard time making new friends and kept quiet about my background for so long, it became frustrating. Being Hapa and trying to fit in was not easy, but I slowly came about my ways and now happy being myself. Thank you for your story!
I totally understand what you mean about “being more Japanese” than full Japanese people. You’re full Japanese imo. It is what’s on the inside that counts!
My caucasian roots are German, Dutch, Welsch, British. I think mostly Dutch.
What are your caucasian ethnicities??? :)